Sex and a dog-eared paperback dictionary (redcoast) wrote,
Sex and a dog-eared paperback dictionary
redcoast

Sorry? I can't understand what you're saying

I can't hear shit. It's really getting aggravating. I don't know whether I can't hear anything or whether I just can't understand, but either way I'm that person going "Huh? HUH?"

So apparently, the noise threshold of where I work is above 85 dB SPL, which means that OSHA requires us to get yearly hearing tests and we're supposed to wear hearing protection. I just got my hearing checked so I know I'm not losing too much hearing, but the results were weird. I did better on the high frequencies than the mid-range frequencies, the ones that people talk at (people with deeper voices anyway, like men). And at one particular high frequency, I did perfect in one ear and borderline mild loss in the other ear, which the guy said shouldn't even be possible. My ears, they are impossible!

So I know my hearing is "normal," but I still can't hear shit, and I can't comprehend anything.

This guy stops by where I'm working, sticks his head in and says "Party!" And I'm like "What?" And he says "Party!" again. And I'm thinking, but ... it's 6 a.m. It's a little early to be partying. It is Friday, though. And I play it say and go "Huh?" again and he says "Party!" again only this time, even though I still hear him say it, after he says it the syllables resolve differently in my mind and I realize he was actually saying "Mornin'!"

And no, he didn't have some strange accent that makes party sound like morning. I just can't hear people in noisy places. Someone will come up to me and I'll hear them say "Execute grey elephants in Nova Scotia," and I'll have to make a choice - go "Huh?" and make them repeat "Execute grey elephants in Nova Scotia!" or I just sort of smile and nod and hope that it isn't important.

It would help if people wouldn't say random things to me. One cook stopped by my dishwashing station, shook my hand and said hi, and then after a few minutes came back, gave me a pot to wash and said "You are a cutie!" Of course, I had him repeat that, because ... like, what? And as soon as I understood, I dissolved into embarrassed giggles and blushed. Because, sadly, it's true. I am a cutie.

What's with the drive-by flirting anyway? I was leaving work and some guy sitting on the bench was like "Watchoo name? Watchoo number?" Dude, I don't even - I've never seen you before in my life and my hair is greasy and I was washing dishes for the past 8 hours and I'm sure I smell like dishwater and I'm wearing blue jeans that don't fit and you're hitting on me? Does this approach actually work? Does it? Maybe I should have given him my number just to see what would have happened. But I couldn't quite hear what he was saying and I was embarrassed and I kind of walked away waving my hands like "I can't even ..."

I should probably wear the ear plugs at work like OSHA requires, but they're too big and they poke in my ear canal and hurt me. I don't think it's health to shove things against my ear drum, so screw that. I guess I'll have to either buy my own or take it up with management (bleh). Besides, no one else wears them and I feel stupid doing so.
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